Penis Pump Patron Pursues Bigger Cock with a Glock
A man purchased a penis pump from a local adult store in a Minnesota town in hopes of procuring a bigger cock. This is a normal occurrence for most sex stores. Normally, when people purchase merchandise, they only return to buy more. This day was a unique one for the clerk who returned in a fit of rage to demand a new product, after putting this product to use.
His request was refused and he held a pistol to the clerk’s head, grabbed a new product and flew out the door with his self-led exchange. A police report was filed, but they store doesn't have video (WTF?) and had no further information on the suspect. One report showed the suspect "remains at large", however, if the penis pump didn't work, I would question their use of the word "LARGE"! And for clarity, I don't know if it was a Glock, buy hey, why not!
The returned product was a penis pump, and he claimed that it did not work and he wanted an item swap. Ew!! Let’s see, the man put his naked, sweaty penis into this merchandise, and just expects the clerk to swap it out? We don’t know this man’s penis or the medical history of his penis, and even if we did, we DON'T CARE!. It is unsanitary to expect the clerk to even touch that box, much less accept it into the store with open arms. "The pump mechanism worked", the man said, "but I don't have a bigger cock.".
The clerk stated the problem was operator error. Regardless of the merchandise being faulty or operator error, the store should never accept returns on toy (but LoveWorks does and then throws the toys away; but that is a topic for another day). . It isn’t a “gently used” consignment store called Slop and Swap. Get serious, dude—man up and accept your losses. (EDITOR: At LoveWorks, our staff never says that. We will do our best to make our customer happy, including taking the loss. But I agree with Aunt Helen, stores shouldn't be taking toys back. Less scrupulous stores with super-easy return policies could very well be re-selling returned toys).
It seems the pump enlarged his balls and gave him the nerve to storm into an adult store to try to return a used penis pump. It also seemed to have turned the entire being into a dick, and the clerk should have told him the product worked because HE was a bigger cock than before. This product is so amazing, it not only pumps the penis, but it makes you one! It also gives you large cajones! Five stars for the penis pump.
One reply on “This Customer Wants a Bigger Cock with a Glock17!”
Nice alliteration