The phrase “penis envy” has changed over those (many) years that Freud coined it. It is more commonly used to describe a person who feels “less than” or “lacking something” when compared to another person.
It no longer is restricted to actually having or being envious of another penis-equipped man. In close circles, women often use the phrase to indicate jealousy over another woman [..]
Sigmund Freud coined the term “Penis Envy” originally to refer to girl’s realization that they did not have a penis. The interesting sub-text of the Freud theory was that all females secretly wished they had a penis.
It really is a strange question isn’t it?
penis envy
An aspect of Sigmund Freud’s developmental theory. [The Freud theory hypothecized] that during development girls had to switch from having the mother as the love object to having the father as the love object: and also switch from the clitoris to the vagina as the main genital zone. At about the age of four, Freud believed that girls first discovered they lacked a penis. The girl will blame her mother or the lack of a penis and the consequent hurt to her own self-esteem. This causes the girl to give up clitoral sexuality, and turn to the father as love object. This aspect of Freud’s theory has received a great deal of criticism, particularly from feminist psychoanalysts. She has penis envy.
From my friends at the Urbandictionary:
Whether the Freud theory is true is certainly questionable. Just like when I think of the guys I have been close to and had sexual discussions with. I would ask if they were envious of my vagina. And the answer was ALWAYS “Yes”.
They told me that they were envious of the power that they perceived the vagina to hold; and they were also envious of the sexual potentials of the vagina – such as having multiple orgasms; and never having to be worry about a lack of erections!
The phrase “penis envy” has changed over those (many) years that Freud coined it. It is more commonly used to describe a person who feels “less than” or “lacking something” when compared to another person.
It no longer is restricted to actually having or being envious of another penis-equipped man. In close circles, women often use the phrase to indicate jealousy over another woman. It became a “slang” phrase that could be used and understood.
Again, from Urbandictionary
Penis envy
When one person is some how perceived to be better by comparison. It may be driven by envy or true admiration.
Her work is so good I think I have penis envy!!
As a female, I can only ask about the “relationship” men have with their penises. And it a very amazing relationship. I never realized how a man’s identity is so caught up in his equipment.
But as an academic, I should have realized it, as every society known to man has worshipped or symbolized the penis in some form of worship forever. And the penises were worshipped for different reasons – from fertility to masculinity.
So it stands to reason that if a man does not feel his penis, his stamina, or his erection-power is up to socially acceptable standards, he can feel substantially slighted and subsequently, less a man.
It is not just porn that allows men to see other men’s penises. Gym locker rooms, or community showers at school give glimpses into how much equipment the other guy’s are packing.
At least when they do see erect penises in porn, they have something to compare to. Flaccid penises in the locker room are a poor choice to make comparisons. Do you remember the old adage, “Are you a grower or a show-er [sic]”?
Performance – the ability to generate rock hard erections on command and keep them has become the financial success of a few companies like Pfizer. All men want the erections of their teens, but doesn’t always happen in real life.
Men age. The penis ages. And in most cases, it takes longer to gain the erection and is often less “tumescent”. [I used that word meaning “swollen” as a reminder to my editor that I can use big words when I want to!]
But as a female, I will never experience the felling of not being able to get hard. I will never experience the excitement and desire of the raging hormones driving me to have penetrative sex with someone, only to have my penis unwilling to stand up and perform. That I understand is a devastating experience, but thankfully, one I will never feel first hand.
Penis Envy in men is not something that is easily “cured”. There are some products that will help with some of the underlying issues, and those are the first possible solutions to pursue.
Viagra and Cialis type prescription medications are one method of addressing the difficulties of not getting as hard. These are prescription-only medications that require a doctor’s visit. Many men are unwilling to visit a doctor and admit that they are having erection difficulties.
For those men, there are over the counter herbal pills such as Rhino and Dragon. Rhino is the number one selling herbal sexual enhancement product on the market. It is also one of the most counterfeited pills. Chances are, if you buy it at a convenience store — it is not the real Rhino.
Products such as Rhino are designed to stimulate blood flow, and allow more blood to flow the to penis. It works virtually the same as the prescription products, but does not require a visit to the doctor.
Penis Pumps are good products to assist in obtaining a firm erection. Pumps use suction to bring blood into the penis, and “constriction rings” (more commonly known as cock rings) help to keep the blood from leaving the engorged penis. Penis pumps are a legitimate product — there are even medically-prescribed penis pumps available.
When I was learning to give blowjobs (“felatio” to my editor) … wait. I meant that my editor wants me to use words like “felatio” when I write. I didn’t mean to imply that I learned to give HIM blowjobs!
Guys would tell me that a good blowjob consisted of SUCTION and FRICTION. The use of the hand was 50% of the work (the “friction”) and the mouth took care of the other 50% (the “suction”). A good blowjob should be able to turn a flaccid penis into an erect penis because of the suction; the same way a penis pump fills the penis with blood.
And that reminds me of this final point: I had a very short and unconsumated relationship with a guy who was hung like a breeding stalion. I took one look at his package and said “Nope. Not happening.”
We laughed about it that night, and he confided something in me that I never forgot. He said that he had penis envy for guys with smaller penises, because he was turned down for sex quite often because of his large size. It was kind of a reverse of the Freud theory.
I guess the moral is, be thankful for what you have. Or in the alternate, be careful what you wish for!!
UPDATE 11/6/19: We are no longer selling sex enhancement pills online; only in our stores. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Cover Art is from the Book, “Penis Envy: 101 Things To Do If You Think Your Penis Is Too Small” by Ricky Bledsoe, available at Amazon.